A little (S)motherly Love

Tonight I cooked a real meal for my sons for the first time in like 3 weeks. Don’t judge me but during the summer months I’m off. It’s too hot to be slaving over sum pan every single night, and half the time they’re not here. Yes my boys are only 12 and 8, but I’m trying to foster a bit of independence in them. My homegurl always laughs at me when I go into my “when I was their age" rants, but if motherhood has taught me one thing it’s that girls are taught far more self-reliance than boys are. When I was 8 not only was I making my own meals but also taking care of my brother and sister (who are twins), and I’m quite sure if I were a boy my mother would’ve found a reliable (female) babysitter.

The mother in me wants to pamper my sons and dote upon them when it comes to cooking, cleaning and other domestic things, but the woman in me wants to prevent them from becoming mama’s boys and teach them to be self sufficient. Besides they never do those (domestic) things quite right anyway, it’s the male way of getting out of household chores I think. Both of my sons’ fathers are their mothers’ only sons and one is an only child. Additionally my high school boyfriend might as well had been his mother’s husband (him being her only child also). So you see I am far too familiar with dating a mama’s boy, and I’ve seen the aftermath of raising a mama’s boy first hand. Now don’t get me wrong I enjoy pampering my men, and I embrace traditional roles of men and women. However the times are changing, hell they have changed! Some women take out the trash and dare I say pump their own gas, Gasp while some men cook dinner and do laundry. Therefore in the event that my sons choose a “modern woman” and find themselves in a “role reversal” kind of situation I want them to be equip to handle it.

I want my boys to appreciate a good cooked meal along with the work and love that goes into preparing one. I want my sons to understand that even if a woman doesn’t have a 9-5 job she works hard making a house a home. I don’t want my sons to subject themselves to a diet of ravioli and ramen noodles because I didn’t teach them their way around the kitchen. Plus a man who can cook is a major turn on. When I send my boys out into the big bad world I want them to be as multi-faceted as the mate they choose, bringing more to the table than just a fork and an empty stomach.

I have a bachelor friend who eats carry out food like 80% of the time and I just shake my head thinking, boy do you need a wife. When I met my son’s father he didn’t even have ice in his ice trays, and alcohol was the only thing in his fridge. If given a choice between a good cooked meal and single life I think 60% of men will choose single life lol. So I’m starting early trying to instill some independence and domestic knowledge in my babies. Hey if they don’t thank me later I’m sure their future wives will.